Posted by Chantelle O'Reilly on

Can You Make Your Partner More Spiritual? 5 Lessons in Ascending Together


One question I get asked frequently is “How can I make my partner practice spirituality with me?” and truthfully,  I used to wonder the same thing, until I tried and failed at trying to force my husband into practicing daily meditation rituals and toting crystals.

Once I finally stopped forcing him to share 5 gratitude with me every morning and getting mad at him if he wasn’t excited enough about it, and I stopped buying him journals as gifts when he really wanted slippers, he ended up adopting spiritual practices that aligned with him, all on his own. In order to make space for his growth, I needed to shift my perspective and release control.   

Can you force your partner to change? No.

Can you support and inspire your partner on their unique ascension journey and allow it to unfold on its own? Yes! And here’s how:


Here’s an unpopular viewpoint, I don’t believe in either of these clichés:

“People don’t change”

“Don’t be with someone in hopes that they will change”

I sure hope I continue to grow and evolve, and I would want the same for my partner.

So long as you are being treated with respect, your boundaries are being honoured, your morals are aligned, and you’re both willing grow, there’s hope.

 Ask yourself:

“Is my partner willing to grow with me?”
“Is my partner willing to accept that they are on an evolution journey?”

 If the answer is yes, all you should be focusing on is your personal growth and continuing to be the best partner you can be, all while fully trusting that they’re doing the same on their side, at their pace, in their way.

 This may be a tough pill to swallow, but those who are blaming their partner for all the trouble in their relationships, are sometimes projecting their own unwillingness to release their ego.

 Are YOU willing to change and grow? Be honest with yourself and do any inner work around stuck points of your own shadows.

In my Article 5 Tips to balance the feminine and masculine in your relationship I speak about a concept I learned from the book “Intimate Communion” by David Deida where in a partnership there needs to be a balance of feminine and masculine energy, whereas one partner takes on the more assertive, masculine role, and one takes on predominately the more feminine nurturing role.

Your gender or sexual orientation actually has nothing to do with it, but using my relationship as an example, I used to lean more on the masculine side of trying to control and plan everything and being overly assertive. The reason these energies didn’t work for me was because I was adopting the masculine energy from a place of fear and control driven by the ego.

I thought that if I can control the situation, make my partner need me, they will stay. If I relax too much into my feminine and let them take the lead, I will be hurt or disappointed.

The beauty of settling into your feminine energy is that when you elevate your frequency, your partner will automatically elevate with you. Not only are you inspiring your partner by being in more alignment, you are also simply able to elevate their frequency via osmosis.

If your partner wants to be more in their feminine and you prefer the masculine, they will get on their own journey and elevate you too, but you must allow them that space.

If we break down spirituality at its core, it’s the practice of developing a deeper connection to your mind, body, soul and energy. For you, that might look like mantra, prayer, yoga, crystals, Kundalini music and spirit guides, but for your partner it may look totally different.

My husband uses manifestation practices with his investments, goes to the gym, goes for walks, reads, learns new perspectives on Youtube videos, listens to podcasts and music.

My practice and his practices all lead to the same place, personal growth and Universal understanding.

Get clear on what your foundational spiritual practices are, practice them frequently.

You can even ask your partner, “What makes you feel most connected to your own thoughts?” or “I love when I am painting and it’s like no time has passed but I realize it’s been hours! What activities make you feel like you’ve entered a time portal?!”.

Start to understand what they are already doing that lights them up and accept their unique expression of connection.

Manifestation is more powerful when there are two or more people holding a high frequency together. Share your dreams with your partner and have open conversations about what you both want the future to look and feel like.

They can smell your coercion, so don’t have the convo in expectation that they’re going to whip out some magazines and a glue stick to make a vision board with you. You’ll end up sorely disappointed when they just drop a casual “That would be nice”.

Show gratitude for both of your shifts and honour the love you have together to watch it grow even deeper!



Amber-Lee is the co-founder of PRISM, as well as an expert in all things chakras, reiki, crystals, multidimensionality and 5D-9D consciousness. She’s also obsessed with fashion, beauty and wellness and created Prism as the ultimate hub for where spirituality meets luxury. She’s the founder and operator of  Chakra Girl Co., founded in 2015, and quickly became a key thought leader and influencer in the spiritual space.




This article is for informational purposes only. It is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice. The views expressed in the article are the views of the cited guest/expert and do not necessarily represent the views of PRISM.



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